With Halloween just 'round the corner, it's only natural to have costume ideas running through the brain. However, it's not okay for companies to play off costumes as "real" clothes. I'm lookin' at you, American Apparel! How dare you try to sell these jester stockings as pantyhose. Innocent hipsters will walk around with two-toned legs and an unhealthy amount of spandex and it will be all your fault.

As if the sight of people wearing gold lamé pants wasn't bad enough, right? American Apparel's two color pantyhose comes in four exponentially horrifying color combinations: black and crème, teal and asphalt, purple and forest, and -- everyone's favorite -- fluorescent yellow and coral.

Here's a fun fashion tip: if you want to guarantee a punch to the face during a night out on the town, wear some of those aforementioned gold lamé pants over these new two color leggings. Granted, you may suffer from a tacky overload before anyone even makes it close enough to give you a knuckle supper.