Playboy hottie and lady friend to Hugh Hefner, Kendra Wilkinson has plenty of admirers. With her So-Cal looks and willingness to express herself toplessly, she is a truly American brand.

You could say that Olive Garden, another "only in America" classic, is a natural match for Kendra, both of them pre-fab, bland and over-processed. In other words, easy to like and available in every mall in America.

But this is a story of unrequited love.

Poor Kendra adores them, especially the chicken parm, but they don't want to sully their "family" image by acknowledging her love. Not only is her style wrong for the chain, they're actually embarrassed that she's always raving about them on The Girls Next Door, her reality show about living with Hef.

Someone in the OG head office needs to go back and check their demographic data. Kendra and her ilk are exactly their target market. Instead of ducking the publicity, they should issue her a lifetime pass for free artichoke dip to thank her for voluntarily pairing her boobs with their food!