Fat behinds ruin the lines of Calvin Klein, and Dior doesn't come in plus sizes. It's time for a diet! But which one? A new one pops up every day. We help you sort them out with Fad Diet du Jour.

The catchy name: Maple Syrup Diet, Lemonade Diet, Master Cleanse

The story: Originally developed by Stanley Burroughs and popularlized in The Master Cleanser, published in 1976. Reintroduced to the world in 2005 by Peter Glickman in his much peppier and promisorily titled book Lose Weight, Have More Energy and Be Happier in 10 Days. The idea is that your body is full of toxins, which get stored in your fat cells, and that makes you sick. If you take some time off from ingesting new toxins, i.e. don't eat for a couple of weeks, your body can expel the built up toxins.

The scrawny celebrity dieter: Confirmed: Beyonce, Robin Quivers. Rumored: Ginger Spice Geri Halliwell, lemon-faced skeletar Renee Zellweger,

The anti-diet propaganda: "It's detox, not a diet! Oh, sure, some people also lose weight..."

The regime: Don't eat anything. Get your calories only from the lemonade, made of fresh squeezed lemons, Grade B maple syrup and cayenne pepper, for 10 to 40 days. Mornings you drink warm salt water to help you "go" and in the evening you can have some laxative tea if you need something more to get things "moving." Oh, and if you must, you may also drink peppermint tea. You know, as a treat. To end the diet, you slowly reintroduce liquids, then solids.

Our judgment: This is a harsh thing to do to your body, especially to your GI system. Diarrhea and constipation are your unpleasant and constant companions. Seriously, you need to stay in the house, and have plenty of toilet tissue on hand.

In terms of your health, most medical professionals say that the body can clean out toxins just fine by itself, and you should worry more about the impact of depriving your body of important nutrients. This probably won't hurt you, but it's strongly suggested that you talk to your doctor first to make sure it doesn't mess up any medications you're taking. Yikes!

Yes, you're losing some fat, but also muscle. Mainly you're losing water weight, and you should expect to put back on at least half of what you lose. Even worse, this kind of starvation diet will slow your metabolism, making it harder to lose and keep weight off in the long run.

Finally, people always talk about how many times they've done it. If we're going to do something this unpleasant and it doesn't work the first time, we're not going back for seconds! No thanks!